Strategy: Don’t answer the question the way they want you to
answer it. Answer the question you wish they asked you.
The Player Example:
Her: “Are you a player?”
You: “You know, that’s very interesting. Many guys get a bad
reputation for being attractive to women. They have good social skills, good
conversational skills, they get along easily with women, yet immediately it’s
assumed they are some kind of promiscuous, deviant, philanderer. I don’t buy
into that. Do you?”
You see how you didn’t answer her question? You answered the
question you wished she would have asked you. In this case, she is assuming
being a player is a bad thing. So the question you do answer is, “Are players
actually bad people?”
You’ve never had a girlfriend? Example:
Her: “You’ve never had a girlfriend?”
You: “You know, it’s interesting. Many guys get a bad
reputation for being focused and hard working in their studies. Guys who want
to improve themselves, guys who are currently focused on developing their
future financial stability and freedom, yet immediately it’s assumed they are
some kind of loner who hates people, have no social skills, or are losers. I
don’t buy that. Do you?”
You don’t go to parties? Example:
Him: “You don’t go to parties?”
You: “You know, it’s interesting. Some guys get a bad
reputation for not being the life of a party, drinking, doing drugs, or
anything else that most people associate with college life these days. These
guys cherish the friends they have and form very deep and lasting relationships
with them. They have good social skills, and care a lot about their friends,
yet immediately it’s assumed that they are some kind of loner who hates people,
have no social skills, or are losers. I don’t buy that. Do you?”
Resource: Carlos Xuma's Alpha Man Conversation and Persuasion Program
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