Haiku #2: Bad Taco Bell In Iowa

My Boobie Vomit

I Want to Smoochie Her Face

Instead I Write Poem

Goal is to Live Life by Making Conscious Decisions

I turned 30 today. Walking with my twin brother last night before I turned 30, made me think of what I want to experience going forward. 

I want to be able to live financially independent (trade for a living, maybe have supplemental income from per diem work and/or have enough money to generate enough income through capital)

I want to travel and explore the pacific northwest (Oregon and Washington) as I went once as a kid. I remember it being beautiful but spent very little time there. 

I want to travel internationally as I have not done much international travelling.

I want to travel to these places with my Boobie who I love sharing experiences with. 

I want to hike in these places, take spectacular photography, climb mountains, climb rocks in these beautiful places. 

In my own vanity, I want to maintain, look, and be as young as possible for as long as I can. 

I want to explore self-expression and authenticity. 

I want to spend enough time with family and friends exploring new adventures. 

Aim to have a different experience that piques your interest.  

Love You

Glowing like the Sun

Boobie is like Hawaii

Paradise and Fun

Why Do I Feel Like I Am the Body?

Are we really just Awareness? How come I so strongly naturally gravitate towards the belief that I am a form, a body? After all, I am not aware of the object in my visual field unless I look at it. Perhaps it is because a large percentage of my perceptions in my Awareness right now seems to be of the body right now. How I am sitting, any aches or pains, the sensations of my hand touching the keyboard, thoughts that are coming into my awareness, these all constitute as what I perceive of as the NOW. Now I look up at an object, and I become aware of it as it enters my Awareness as the perception enters my Awareness. Does this mean I am now the object as it is in my Awareness? What is the difference between the object and the body? All objects and forms are made of atoms and the same subatomic particles. Is the body really different from that object? Perhaps we feel the body is alive and is different becasue we experience more of the body. There are more perceptions coming into our Awareness that we believe are of the body, so therefore we are "limited" to our bodies. Would we say that our Awareness is limited to "inside" our heads? Perhaps that is because we are experiencing mostly visual perceptions. Where would a blind person say "they" are located at? Where would a deaf person? Would they say they are the ears? Would a deaf and blind person they are the skin, as they feel their dominant perceptions are tactile? Would a person in severe sensory deprivation such as in solitary confinement say they don't exist anymore just because most of their perceptions are not of the body anymore? They dream, they have intense hallucinations, and are definitely aware of these "images", sounds, and perceptions. Are those real then, or are they hallucinations? Perhaps perceptions and sensations are lying and inaccurate all the time? What we experience as life through oncoming and going perceptions is ever changing although they may feel stagnant from time to time. 

Perhaps science can tell us what is real? Leo Gura at actualized.org has an excellent talk about the limits of Rationalism here. In essence, Science is also a framework, a model created by the human mind fueled by a human desire to make sense of the world. Is it possible that the world and the universe is actually not rational at all, or a-rational? We find one model of science which seems to explain a lot of what we think explains what we perceive and the mechanical laws of the universe. But we have holes and gaps in other areas. Maybe we just need to give science more time and it will explain EVERYTHING in the universe that can be measured objectively and what we experience subjectively from perceptions? Science is great, it has given us insights into "making sense" of the world we perceive. But it has limitations, and this is not something a rationalist would easily accept. Hardcore rationalists can be as dogmatic as very religious individuals. Both can be stubbornly in belief that only their "method" can explain the universe and the world "out there". Both are just one framework created by the human mind, forged from human desire, to make sense of something that doesn't necessarily have to make sense to the human mind at all. 

And science is only a story we tell ourselves as well. We tell ourselves facts, and this is how the universe works. And like stories, science is constantly changing and being revised all the time. What was considered a fact hundreds of years ago changes hundreds of years later. To be a scientist is to work from one framework or model, through one perceptional ability/the thinking ability. Thinking is just one perception that comes into our awareness. To be a scientist, especially a theoretical physicist or quantum physicist, is to be working on the boundaries of certainty and uncertainty all the time. Theories change all the time. And the current science from quantum physics says atoms exist as probability wave, and only when observed, does the probability wave collapse into one outcome that is perceived. Science has also "proven" that objects in the "real world" are made of atoms and that atoms are comprised 99.99999% of empty space. So as the story of science tells us right now, objects and things are not so real either. But again, science itself has its limitations, as good as it is. 

A Realization of Spiritual Enlightenment

What is Meant by these sections:

"Just stay relaxed, open and sincere, live from your natural integrity, and, as much as realistically possible, be a giver not a taker (i.e., be as generous as you can, yet don't be a "doormat" for selfish people to walk all over you and exploit you financially, emotionally, etc.). And eventually, naturally, the Sun will dawn— i.e., your True Identity simply "re-cognizes" that this Self or Awareness is the "wall-less container," the open, free Context for whatever happens. With this realization comes a profound sense of release and relief, the re-discovery that you have never been in the world, the world is in YOU, the Self of all. Here is true freedom, true peace, true bliss. Your Real Nature."

     "And when these persons do meet, at "the appointed time," what will happen? Phenomena will interact (bodies hugging, voices sounding, eyes gazing into eyes, heart feeling into heart), yet, as medieval Hindu sage Jnaneshvar declared, "it will be like taste tasting itself to savor its own Sweetness"! For there will be what has always only been the case: Absolute Awareness, ever the Self-same Self of all, abiding in/as bodiless, mindless, wordless Glory and Splendor, enjoying the play of vibrating forms made of the formless."

   
   "If your devotional heart wishes to love, honor and worship the formless I-Self as the Divine Beloved, then look and feel all around you: EVERYONE and EVERYTHING you meet in this life-DREAM is the adorable Self in disguise. And this includes the bodymind known as "Alycia." She, too, is the literal embodiment of God/Goddess. (Look in the mirror and you're seeing the manifest embodiment of God.) So, too, everyone in your life, including all the characters on the world stage (including brother W. Bush, an amazing Guru—indeed, a Divine Avatar—challenging all of us progressives to authentically live love, compassion, and kindness!)...

You are the Great Spaciousness, wide open for a world to happen in."

Credit of the following thoughts that occurred is largely attributed to the bodily entity Named Timothy Conway at 

1. http://www.enlightened-spirituality.org/questions_and_answers_on_nondual_spiritual_awakening.html     and

2. http://www.enlightened-spirituality.org/Relationship_Spirituality.html

Realization:

       World = perceptual phenomena occurring NOW on "top" of the real YOU, AWARENESS. That tissue box and sprouted pumpkin seed bag “I” see (visual perception) on my desk, is no different from the body you see right now. They are all objects/forms occurring as perceptions and phenomena experienced by the underlying changeless AWARENESS, the real you. In a sense, to identify with the body as who you are means you might as well identify with that sprouted pumpkin seed bag that is being perceived by AWARENESS/ME. They are both forms - think form vs formless/awareness - being perceived by awareness/me via perceptions, concepts, thoughts, and beliefs that come together as a package when the perception of the body and the pumpkin seed bag is throughout AWARENESS/ME. Thoughts while seemingly not a form, are still just perceptions that come and pass. Do the tissue box and pumpkin seed bag exist? For Awareness to know if something exists, it must be perceived as a perception. Can Awareness experience some "thing" if the perceptions that makes up the experience are not in Awareness? There is no way to experience the “existence” of some "thing" without the perceptions being present via Awareness. I surmise it is a pointless question. Therefore, the world is not out there, but is in YOU, AWARENESS. You are a limitless, no boundary Awareness, experiencing a myriad of different perceptions in the forms of thoughts, feelings, desires, visual perceptions, auditory, perceptions, tactile perceptions, and so on, but ultimately, just perceptions. All of these perceptions occurring in what the human body/brain can only conceive of as, as the NOW, to which you are none of these. These perceptions over countless NOWS, form the illusion, the deception i.e. the ego. The ego has never existed. To rid of the illusion of a YOU beyond Awareness is by perceiving the truth that the perceptions over countless NOWS never was, is, over ever will be YOU, as the NOWS are experienced. The perceptions are ever changing, even though they may feel similar at times, but note that the feeling is a perception itself nonetheless. What is experienced as life is ultimately a dream in the sense that perceptions come into Awareness and change in Awareness. Perceptions are not solid or ever-lasting. And that is the dream. Dream is defined as some “thing” that is ultimately at it’s core, different from NOW … to … NOW. Perceptions comes into Awareness and changes in Awareness. Awareness is the REAL YOU because it never changes and is always consistent. Life = perceptions occurring over countless NOWS via Awareness. Perceptions = dream because it is ever changing/not consistent. Only REALITY – defined as what is real/consistent throughout the ever-changing perceptions experienced – is Awareness. The world is not out “there”. The world/perceptions is ultimately in Awareness, YOU. This is what is meant as the Divine, Infinite Awareness expressing itself in different “forms”/bodily entities. At the core, it is the Same, One Awareness perceiving myriads of “individual” perceptions over countless NOWS giving rise to the illusion of separateness.

“Hence, our partner's true reality as Awareness is not "out there," but RIGHT HERE, closer to us than our own mind or body or ego-sense.”
http://www.enlightened-spirituality.org/Relationship_Spirituality.html

In other words, 

Other "individuals/people/beings/bodily entities” are actually closer to us that our own thoughts, concepts and visual perceptions of “our bodies”, as we are and have always been, the same, one Awareness.

“Love thy neighbor as thy self” - Jesus

Sunday, June 12th, 2016, 3:11 AM PST

2016 This is the Year

Where Will I Be in My Life in 10 Years?

Here's to 10 years from 2015, when I will be 33, looking back on this post.

Michael