Happiness Comes from Giving, Not Buying and Having - Materialism Doesn't Lead to Well-Being, but Altruism Does Published on January 9, 2015 by Steve Taylor, Ph.D.

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/out-the-darkness/201501/happiness-comes-giving-not-buying-and-having

So many of us strive so hard for material success that you might think there was a clear relationship between wealth andhappiness. The media and our governments encourage us to believe this, since they need us to keep earning and spending to boost economic growth. From school onwards, we’re taught that long term well-being stems from achievement andeconomic prosperity - from ‘getting on’ or ‘making it’, accumulating more and more wealth, achievement and success.

Consequently, it comes as a shock for many people to learn that there is no straightforward relationship between wealth and well-being. Once our basic material needs are satisfied (i.e. once we’re assured of regular food and adequate shelter and a basic degree of financial security), wealth only has a negligible effect on well-being. For example, studies have shown that, in general, lottery winners do not become significantly happier than they were before, and that even extremely rich people - such as billionaires - are not significantly happier than others. Studies have shown that American and British people are less contented now than they were 50 years ago, although their material wealth is much higher. On an international level, there does appear to some correlation between wealth and well-being, partly because there are many countries in the world where people’s basic material needs are not satisfied. But this correlation is not a straightforward one, sincewealthier countries tend to be more politically stable, more peaceful and democratic, with less oppression and more freedom - all of which are themselves important factors in well-being. 

So why do put so much effort into acquiring wealth and material goods? You could compare it to a man who keeps knocking at a door, even though he’s been told that the person he’s looking for isn’t at home. ‘But he must be in there!” he shouts, and barges in to explore the house. He storms out again, but returns to the house a couple of minutes later, to knock again. Seeking well-being through material success is just as irrational as this.

Well-Being through Giving 

If anything, it appears that there is a relationship between non-materialism and well-being. While possessing wealth and material goods doesn’t lead to happiness, giving them away actually does. Generosity is strongly associated with well-being. For example, studies of people who practise volunteering have shown that they have better psychological and mentalhealth and increased longevity. The benefits of volunteering have been found to be greater than taking up exercise, or attending religious services - in fact, even greater than giving up smoking. Another study found that, when people were given a sum of money, they gained more well-being if they spent it on other people, or gave it away, rather than spending it on themselves. This sense of well-being is more than just feeling good about ourselves - it comes from a powerful sense of connection to others, an empathic and compassionate transcendence of separateness, and of our own self-centredness. 

In fact, paradoxically, another study has shown that this is one way in which money actually can bring happiness: if you give away the money you earn. This research - by Dunn, Gilbert and Wilson - also showed that money is more likely to bring happiness is you spend it on experiences, rather than material goods. (1) Another study (by Joseph Chancellor and Sonja Lyubomirsky) has suggested that consciously living a lifestyle of ‘strategic underconsumption’ (or thrift) can also lead to well-being. (2)

So if you really want enhance your well-being - and as long as yourbasic material needs are satisfied - don’t try to accumulate money in yourbank account, and don’t treat yourself to material goods you don’t really need. Be more generous and altruistic - increase the amount of money you give to people in need, give more of your time to volunteering, or spend more time helping other people, or behaving more kindly to everyone around you. Ignore the ‘happiness means consumption’ messages we’re bombarded with by the media. A lifestyle of generosity and under-consumption may not suit the needs of economists and politicians - but it will certainly make us happier. 

We would do well to heed the words of the American Indian, Ohiyesa, speaking of his Sioux people:

‘It was our belief that the love of possessions is a weakness to be overcome. Its appeal is to the material part, and if allowed its way, it will in time disturb one’s spiritual balance. Therefore, children must early learn the beauty of generosity. They are taught to give what they prize most, that they may taste the happiness of giving.’

Steve Taylor, Ph.D. is a senior lecturer in psychology at Leeds Beckett University, UK. He is the author of Back to Sanity and The Fall. www.stevenmtaylor.com

Follow Steve on Facebook Follow Steve on Twitter

Image courtesy of:http://tamegoeswild.com/all_about_the_tame/ratrace.htm 

References:

(1)http://www.wjh.harvard.edu/~dtg/DUNN%20GILBERT%20&%20WILSON%20(2011).pdf

(2) http://sonjalyubomirsky.com/files/2012/09/CLinpress.pdf

Sweet Mama Dog Interacting with a Beautiful Child with Down Syndrome. From Jim Stenson

Sweet Mama Dog Interacting with a Beautiful Child with Down Syndrome. From Jim Stenson

Better Than Happiness: One man’s successful search for meaning. Published on December 20, 2014 by Linda and Charlie Bloom, in Stronger at the Broken Places

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/stronger-the-broken-places/201412/better-happiness

It may sound strange coming from someone who has written dozens of blogs about happiness and taught a lot of seminars on the subject, to hear that happiness isn’t necessarily all that it’s cracked up to be. Or put another way, in terms of one’s overall quality of life, spirit, and degree of personal fulfillment, some things play a much more significant role than feelings of happiness. I’ll get to that in a minute.

In my freshman year of college I read a book that changed my life. It was at the time the most important book that I had ever read, and it continues to be to this day. It’s entitled, Man’s Search for Meaning and it was written in 1946 by the Viennese psychiatrist and neurologist, Viktor Frankl.

Frankl had been recently liberated from a concentration camp in which he had been imprisoned for several years, and shortly after receiving news that the Nazis executed his entire family, including his wife, pregnant with their first child, his brother, and both of his parents, as well as many other relatives.

What Frankl personally witnessed and experienced during his incarceration led him to a conclusion that to this day stands as one of the most succinct and profound statements ever written about the human condition. That is that “everything can be taken from a [person] but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances.” The circumstances in which Frankl lived during the war years, were beyond horrific. His writings were not simply expressions of a theory, but were grounded in his daily self-reflection on his own experience and his observation of countless other inmates and how they did or did not manage to survive unspeakable conditions.

Frankl discovered that the primary variable that influenced the likelihood of whether his fellow prisoners survived of perished had to do with the degree to which they were identified with a purpose larger than themselves, particularly one in which they saw themselves as contributing in some meaningful way to the enhancement of the quality of others’ lives. He claimed that those prisoners who suffered the physical and mental cruelties of the camps and managed to survive also tended to be the ones who sought and found the wherewithal to share the little they had, a comforting word, a crust of bread, or an act of simple kindness with others. Giving to others was of course not a guarantee of survival, but it was a way of sustaining a sense of purpose and meaning in the face of overwhelmingly brutal conditions. Without purpose of meaning, our life spirit diminishes and we become more vulnerable to physical and mental stressors.

While it’s natural to prefer happiness to suffering, Frankl recognized the paradox that a sense of purpose and meaning often is born out of adversity and pain, and he understood the potentially redemptive value in suffering. The recognition that there can be some good that comes out of our most painful experiences can be the central factor in the process of transforming suffering into purpose.

In the January 2013 issue of the Atlantic Monthly, in her article entitled,There’s More to Life than Being Happy, Emily Esfahani Smith writes, “Research has shown that having meaning and purpose in life increases overall well-being and life satisfaction, improves mental and physicalhealth, enhances resiliency and self esteem, and decreases the chances of depression.” She goes on to state that according to recent research, “the single-minded pursuit of happiness is ironically leaving people less happy.”

Happiness is usually associated or confused with pleasure, which has to do with experiencing enjoyable feelings and sensations. We feel happy when a need or desire is fulfilled, when we get what we want. The researcher, Kathleen Vohs claims that “Happy people get a lot of joy from receiving benefits from others, while people leading meaningful lives get a lot of joy from giving to others.”

A 2011 study concluded that people who have meaning in their lives through a clearly defined purpose, rate their life satisfaction higher even when they were feeling bad, than those without a sense of purpose.

Several years prior to writing his groundbreaking book, Viktor Frankl was already living from a deep sense of purpose that at times required him to forego personal desires in favor of his commitment to fulfill other, purpose-driven intentions. In 1941 Austria had already been occupied by the Germans for three years. Frankl knew that it was just a matter of time before his parents would be taken away. At the time he was already distinguished internationally for his contributions to the field of psychology and had a widespread reputation. He had applied for and was given a visa to America where he and his wife would be safe from the Nazis, but as it became evident that his parents would inevitably be sent to a concentration camp, he recognized that he had to choose between rejecting his visa to America to help his parents make the painful and difficult adjustment to the camps, or to go to America to save himself and his wife and further pursue his career. After considerable deliberation he understood that his deepest purpose was in his loyalty and responsibility to his aging parents. He made the decision to put aside his individual pursuits, stay in Vienna and dedicate his life to being in service to his parents and later, to other inmates in the camps.

Frankl’s experiences during this time served to form the basis of his theoretical and clinical work that has since profoundly impacted on the quality of life for millions of people worldwide.

Viktor Frankl died in 1997 at the age of 92. He spent his post-war years continuing to embody his commitment to serve through his teaching, his writings, and many other forms of contribution to the welfare of humanity. His life served as a stunning example of one man’s extraordinary capacity to find and create meaning in a life that was at times characterized by indescribable physical and emotional suffering. He was literally living proof of the claim that we all have the power to choose our attitude in any given set of conditions, regardless of what the circumstances are, and that the choice that we make is the determining factor in the quality of our life. While there may be times when the ability to choose to feel happy doesn’t seem available to us, there is never a time in which we lack the ability to choose our attitude. Frankl’s life, more so than his written words, affirms that we all possess the power to make and act on this choice. It was, beyond any fragment of a doubt, a life well-lived.

The Reality of Consciousness, Peter Russell

Why a star football player traded NFL career for a tractor By Steve Hartman/CBS News/ November 14, 2014, 7:49 PM

Love what Jason Brown is doing!

http://www.cbsnews.com/news/former-nfl-player-farms-for-good/

What a great role model!

R.I.P. Dolores Cannon, Thank You For All You've Done

Doreen's Blog Post

Rest In Peace Dolores Cannon (1931-October 18th, 2014)

http://qhht.vanillaforums.com/discussion/5508/sad-news-dolores-has-passed

I am currently listed as a Basic Practitioner and I don't think I can post on the Quantum Healing Hypnosis Forum, so I guess I will write what I want to write here. When I first found out, I was sitting at Denver International Airport waiting to board a flight back to San Francisco International. I had just received an email from Candace CrawGoldman from my Google mail.

It said: [QHHT Support Forum] Candace_CrawGoldman started a new discussion: Sad News: Dolores has Passed

To put it simply, I felt saddened and shocked even though she is obviously advanced in her years. We lost a great pioneer in healing today. We lost her in the physical realm and I know her soul is happier now on the other side. Still, I wish I got to take her Level 2 class with her in person later this year. I was hoping I would be able to meet her in person. But I guess that won't happen now. I feel lost, wondering where Dolores Cannon's students and practitioners will go from here. Who will continue her work? Reporting on the Subconscious' everlasting wisdom? What part will I be able to play from here?

My mood is somewhat dampened because of her passing. It shouldn't be shocking that someone of her age has passed on, but I still feel shocked. I would like to know if she passed peacefully, and what happened. On the website listed above, it says:

Candace_CrawGoldman Wichita, KS USAPosts: 2,115Administrator, Moderator, Recommended Dedicated Practitioner
11:26AM  in General News Flag  

It is with the most profound sadness I am sharing with you the news that our beloved Dolores is no longer with us in the physical realm. Please know and trust that she will always be assisting us and connected to us no matter what.    

Here is a note from Julia.  

Hi Everyone, 

It is with a heavy heart that we let you know that Dolores passed into her next world this morning. To this end she was the Dolores that we all know and love and we want you all to know that she appreciated very much the loving energy and prayers you sent her way these last few weeks. She was with all of her family this morning and left surrounded by their and your love. Her heart will remain connected to us all.  

Julia

I read on Candace's website that Dolores was in some kind of accident?

UPDATE added September 25, 2014. Unfortunately due to an accident involving Dolores Cannon, the following workshop has been cancelled and will need to be rescheduled at a later date. Thank you for your understanding.

I guess all I can say is that she will be missed, and I will remember her, for she has changed my life. It is because of her work that I am a spiritual person today. She is one of the MAIN reasons. Thank you Dolores for all that you did for us (everyone who has been inspired by Dolores, and there are many)! Thank you for your work, your QHHT technique to help and heal people, the love that you gave people, the lost knowledge and information that you've imparted us in your books, as well as the tremendous ways you've changed our lives for the better! I can only hope I will be able to play as big of a part as you did to inspire, help, and change the lives of others.

The following is from Dolores' book, Between Death and Life, that I feel is appropriate.

Thus we will never actually know until we leave our body for the last time and journey toward the brilliant light that marks the barrier between this world and the next. Even with the knowledge I have gained through my work I am not anxious to make that trip. At least, not yet. I feel I have much to accom­plish yet here on this plane. For in my study of death, I have found the celebration of life. 

But I think when the time comes the journey will not hold as much fear as it once would have. Because I know I am not going into a strange, dark, forbidding unknown. I am merely returning home and there will be as many familiar people and sights on those planes as there are on this one. Maybe the infor­mation I have found has allowed us to lift the veil a little and peer beyond, and allowed us to glimpse through the glass into the shadows and what we see is not as dark as it was before. It is the awakening of memories long buried. And the memories are truly wonderful, because what we see is a beautiful sight to behold. 

I am grateful that I was allowed to have these conversations with the spirits. What they have told me encourages the shed­ding of fears and doubts and brings the realization that what lies beyond the barrier is only a joyous "home-coming."

- Dolores Cannon's Between Death and Life  

Of utmost importance, remember the good the departed have done for us. Don't hold them back by overly grieving their passing. They are much happier on the other side, no matter how great their life here may have been. We will all be reunited one day. There Will Be a Day!

                                                  There Will Be a Day, by Jeremy Camp


10:18 PM, Saturday, October 18th, 2014

Awareness After Death? Study Hints It Exists Oct 9, 2014 03:00 PM ET // by Sheila M. Eldred

http://news.discovery.com/human/life/awareness-after-death-study-hints-it-exists-141009.htm

http://news.discovery.com/human/life/awareness-after-death-study-hints-it-exists-1410091.htm